I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
