So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Even my vagina gasped.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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