I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
