so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
