remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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