Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
