so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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