i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
