Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Pants are for mortals
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
