Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
