Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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