id be glad to
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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