Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i will never coherently bang her
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize
