My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
