At least make sure they are 18
Why
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
