Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
