Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
