No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Randomize
