Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
