so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I bet he comes in French.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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