Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
