I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
