Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize