I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
