do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
