bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
