..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just found puke in my bra..
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
