Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
