let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize