Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize