Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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