I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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