i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
she peed on how many people?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
