Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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