he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize