She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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