this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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