You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
