There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
