Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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