I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
