just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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