Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
