You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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