My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
