Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
