party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
