Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
The adults are the big ones right?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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