she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
