Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
