yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
