you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
